Exhaustion, and week in review

I am just plain tuckered out! I decided to run last night, do a fitness class this morning, and then run again right after the class. Now I want to sleep the afternoon away (which... with a five-year-old? Is a total pipe dream) and eat.

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Things about last week that stand out:

• My son's first day of Kindergarten! I'm so proud of him and hope that this year will be a wonderful experience.
• Going to, and making a sincere effort to keep up with, a new barre class (even though I am, physically speaking, the anti-ballerina)
• Getting my fall schedule figured out
• Beautiful weather with some much-needed rain mixed in
• Keeping up with my goal to drink ~64 ounces of water every day
• Cooking something new (chickpea patties - yum)
• Mood: Pretty upbeat overall

Things I'm looking forward to:

• Date night with my husband
• My two closest friends from school finally returning from their looooong summer field seasons in exotic areas of the world (Iceland and New Zealand) 
• Another relatively relaxing, work-free day tomorrow

Things I'm grateful for:

• My sweet, smart, energetic, creative, affectionate little boy 
• My laid-back husband, who doesn't always understand me but unconditionally accepts me
• The best, most supportive, most energetic dissertation advisor ever - we butt heads sometimes, but I can't imagine a better mentor
• Time for relaxation
• Amazing opportunities - school, travel, free public education for my child, good health, employment
• The capacity, freedom, and opportunity to make changes, and people who are willing to help me as I strive to do so

I like this: "Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe that change forever how we experience life and the world." - John Milton

What about you? What are you grateful for?

The first day

Today was my son's first day of Kindergarten - well, half-day orientation, but close enough. It was the first time he met other children in his class and spent appreciable time with his teachers.

The whole operation went as smoothly as it possibly could have. Dropped him off; no tears (he seemed a little anxious until the tall, pretty blonde teacher asked him about his Transformers backpack... She won him over in seconds.) Picked him up; all smiles. Unprompted, he even told me about part of his day: he colored in an apple picture and cut it out, and he ate lunch in the cafeteria. Given that he's always been reluctant to tell us about activities at his preschool, I took this as a sign that he's excited about his new experience.

A few months ago I worried about him going to Kindergarten: he's so shy sometimes... Would he be okay? Would he be able to stand up for himself if someone picked on him? Would his learning be totally test-oriented? Would the kids get enough science, art, and playtime? Would someone hurt him, and if someone DID hurt him, would he tell me? I really worked myself into quite a frenzy and was well on my way to becoming the poster mother for Helicopter Parenting.

In late April all of those concerns veritably disappeared when we went to the school to pre-register him. He fell in love immediately: with the library stocked with computers, books, and comfy seats; with the music room filled with drums, xylophones, guitars, and other instruments; with the bright, colorful Kindergarten classrooms; with the computer lab.

I fell in love with the school, too, mainly because it reminded me so much of my own public elementary school: not at all fancy, very diverse in terms of student population, down to earth, warm. If I have one academic-related wish for my son right now, it's that he enjoys this part of his educational journey as much as I did. For me, school was a source of comfort and consistency, a place where I couldn't wait to be every day because I knew I'd be doing and learning new things. Every morning was like Christmas. My teachers played a critical, vital part in shaping not only my knowledge base, but my sense of self-worth and self-confidence. Even now, I can still remember the names of each one of my K-6 teachers, and I think of all of them fondly because they were so kind to me. They made me feel like I could do anything.

With my son starting grade school, I am reminded that it is perfectly okay for a village - not just the parents - to help raise a child. In my own life, I don't know where I would be now without that village. My son's childhood is different than mine, but nevertheless, I want him to develop bonds with people - adults and kids - other than us. No one person can be everything for someone else, not even a parent for her child.

ETA: 3-mile run followed immediately by 1-hour "ballet class" = I can't bend my arms. Or legs.

Five things (cherries, Kindergarten, television shows about drugs, etc.)

• I am in love with fresh summer cherries. Rainier cherries are my favorite but really, any decently-priced ones will do.
• Also I am in love with the show Breaking Bad (four or five complete seasons on streaming Netflix). It's about two guys who make crystal meth, and it's a lot funnier and more riveting than it sounds.
• I'm going back for more Xtend Barre tomorrow. I'm not as sore as I thought I'd be, and I feel really good about myself even though I can't actually see any results yet, of course. My goal is to do that followed by a 45-minute run. I was supposed to do the run today but lack of self-discipline kicked in. So I'll double up tomorrow.
• My son has his half-day Kindergarten orientation tomorrow! AAAAAAAHHHH! I feel like we (me, husband, son) are all very unprepared, and none of us seems to believe it's actually happening, but here goes...
• I sound more upbeat here than I actually feel. 

Xtend Barre: I'm not going to be able to move tomorrow

This evening I went to my first fitness class in... I don't know. Five years? Six? More? Fitness classes aren't usually my thing.

I've realized for a while now, however, that a) when it comes to running, my body has a lot of muscle memory, meaning that even when I do longer or faster runs, I don't get as much out of it (physically, I mean) as I used to and b) I need to do something that will improve my strength, flexibility, and muscle tone.

You know those runners with the 12-pack abs and sculptured arms?

That is not me. I look like someone who runs a few miles and then sneaks off to the donut shop to refuel with a box of Munchkins (I don't, but if they were gluten free, it would be tempting).

So anyway, Groupon recently had a deal for this combo ballet/pilates/torture workout called Xtend Barre. It sounds very pretty and when you look at the Xtend Barre website, it also looks very pretty. I pictured myself pointing my toes, doing some plies, and maybe jete-ing across the studio (very unrealistic; see post from a few days ago), my muscles gently rippling beneath my skin.

Reality check: This workout was hard. About halfway through, I was sweating buckets and my legs were shaking so badly that I thought I might collapse into a soggy heap next to the barre and then puke on the floor. This particular fitness class would be excellent preparation for boot camp.

At the same time, I really enjoyed it and could immediately tell that I'd gotten something out of it. I haven't worked my muscles this way in ages.

I have five more discounted classes thanks to my Groupon code, and I'm looking forward to them... sort of. I'll schedule my next session just as soon as I can walk again.

Chickpea patties with roasted veggies

Five years ago, I cooked fairly often but didn't necessarily relish it. Trying to time each component of the meal, limit the amount of mess I made, wash the dishes as I went along (something my husband strongly believes in, probably because it means he doesn't have to spend as much time at the sink after dinner), make adjustments based on the availability of ingredients (or lack thereof)... It was kind of stressful. Also, I was perfectionistic. Every meal had to be a masterpiece. I'm no Julia Child, and with my attitude, I was doomed to culinary misery.

Going gluten free forced me to cook on a much more regular basis. I couldn't go out to eat nearly as often as I had in my pre-GF days; when I did, the food was usually disappointing. So cooking at home was almost always cheaper and sometimes more tasty. :-) At first I relied heavily on recipes, but then I realized that when you use fresh ingredients, you don't need to do a whole lot to food to make it taste good. And because I started to see food as fuel, I didn't get as upset if it didn't turn out as I'd hoped. It was still nutritious. Once I took some of the pressure off myself and reduced the complexity of my cooking efforts, the whole act of preparing a meal became a lot more relaxing and enjoyable. And as with most things, practice makes easier (not perfect - perfect is not a goal [or so I lecture myself on a regular basis]).

Tonight I made fried chickpea patties. The recipe is taken from Oh She Glows. I changed two things: I used GF flour instead of regular flour, and I fried the patties instead of baking them. We don't fry very often, and until recently it actually kind of scared me. But fried food... tastes good. And it cooks quickly. So I've gotten a little more comfortable with it.

Per the recipe, I combined red onion, garlic, cumin, coriander, and some salt and pepper (I kind of eyeballed the measurements). In a separate bowl, I mashed up two cans of chickpeas with my hands (not the cans, just the chickpeas... har har) and added the GF flour. My son mixed it all together.

Chickpeas and flour in wooden bowl; onions, garlic, and spices in blue bowl

I divided the mixture into 10 pieces and patted them into little disks:

Then I covered the bottom of a saute pan with canola oil, let it warm up on medium-high heat, and added the patties once the oil was very hot (I deemed it "very hot" when I dropped in a chickpea and saw it sizzle):

Not a pretty picture. Oh well. Does frying ever look pretty?

I fried the patties for ~4 minutes on one side and ~3 minutes on the other. Then I placed them on towels to soak up some of the excess oil.

I served them with roasted brussels sprouts and grape tomatoes (mix sprouts and tomatoes with a generous swizzle of olive oil, add salt and pepper, bake for 30 minutes at ~400 degrees). 

I was really pleased with the flavor and texture combinations: sweet tomatoes, slightly salty Brussels sprouts, patties that were light and crispy on the outside and soft on the inside. Perfect. Total comfort food. And easy to make.

Weekend in pictures and a documentary recommendation

This was a great, lazy, relaxed weekend. Again, I'm so glad to be home. I'm so glad that I didn't have anything scheduled. And I'm very, very, VERY glad the weather was so beautiful, because it meant I got to spend a lot of time sitting out on my patio without melting.

This weekend I...

Went running: outside on Saturday and on the treadmill today (26 minute higher-intensity workout consisting of 3 minutes of walking, 20 minutes of >5K pace, 3 more minutes of walking)

Ate a lot. My son and I made cookies, as planned:

On Saturday I made a delicious dinner salad with romaine and spinach, mandarin oranges, cucumber, almonds, plums, cherries, tomatoes, carrots, and avocado:

I dug through 3/4 of this evil gluten-free cereal that my husband purchased for me. It's like crack. I can never allow him to purchase it ever, ever again.

Played with my son. We spent some time with Play-doh...

...then decided to ramp up the excitement by going outside with a bunch of different foods to see what ants prefer to eat. According to our very scientific study, they love chocolate chip cookies and American cheese, but aren't all that fond of carrots:

(All those little dark specks on the cookie are ants.)

 We also found this guy while we were experimenting:

Drank wine. Outside. 

Watched two documentaries (I love documentaries): Home and Triage. "Home" was interesting but left me feeling incredibly frustrated/maybe a little outraged at the woman who "starred" in it. "Triage" was painful to watch but important in sending out a reminder that we're all united by the human condition. I highly highly highly recommend it.

"It’s not about creating the perfect future. it is about responding to another human being who is suffering in a very particular way, and responding to them in a very particular way. With the expectation that that is the starting point of what we are as human beings.” - James Orbinski, Triage

Easy, daydreamy Saturday four-miler

The weather is gorgeous today: high in the low 80s, sunny, low humidity. So I went to my favorite local park and ran the one-mile loop four times:

It's a lovely park, with lots of open green space, lots of trees, and great play areas for children. Sometimes when I'm there, I pretend I'm at a park in Paris. This doesn't make a lot of sense considering that I have never actually been to Paris and have no idea what its parks are like. But still. I imagine that everyone is speaking French and that they are out for a stroll before going to the market to buy bread and cheese. Bonjour, Monsieur et Madame! (That could be wrong. I don't speak French.)

Shady. Cool. Wonderful. Such a relief after this relentless heat. The breeze on my skin felt so good. I could have stayed all day (not running the whole time, of course, but I'd have been happy there with a picnic lunch and a tasty beverage).

My right foot turns out naturally - see above. I walk and run like a duck. Sometimes I imagine that I could have been a ballet dancer: first position would have been so easy for me. Again, like the French park thing, this makes little sense. I have no dancing ability whatsoever, I'm too short and stocky to be a ballet dancer, and my cellulite would be tough to disguise in a leotard. But I pretend anyway.